Mayonnaise Is Good For The Hare



Easters I recall are fraught with brightly decorated eggs. I think hiding them is better than looking for them, and in some cases, finding them.

Once there was a lonely, green-dyed, hard-boiled egg -- it was probably that color inside by the time mom discovered it under the sofa in early May.

In subsequent years, eggs were hidden outside.

One year my mom cracked a decorated raw egg on my adult brother's head during a silly argument.

The chase around and around the house was on.

Mayo can be used to treat dry hair, but I know that is not what she had in mind. She claims to this day she thought the egg was hard boiled. Whatever they were arguing about is lost in the laughter we recall the tale with now.

Then there were Easter picnics with extended family, under perfectly blue skies (that was 25 years ago when people with asthma still moved to the Valley for the clean air).

Those picnics often took place on land, my uncle owned, in the middle of the desert.

That area is now Cave Creek and full of houses.

But back then we flew kites, drove dune buggies and ate BBQ. One year my cousin Duane even fed me rattlesnake. I thought it was chicken.

Easter Sunday started at about 3 a.m.

I grew up in a faith where sunrise Easter services were a moving experience. The service was timed for Christ to rise with the sun. It absolutely did not have the same effect when played to accommodate/convert the masses over several evening performances.

Cultures throughout history held festivals for their gods and goddesses at the turning of the season.

Ostara was celebrated in Scandinavia, and festivals were held for Aphrodite, goddess of love and beauty on the isle of Cypress.

Igor Stravinsky composed the Rites of Spring and reportedly had a fit when Walt Disney used it to back the scene of dinosaurs fighting in the animated movie, Fantasia.

Peasant people dancing was his interpretation of the music, but rites of spring have been going on far longer than a lop-eared Easter Bunny's ears are long, and at least as long as folks have been arguing what came first, the chicken or the egg.

Both chickens and eggs can be seen at the Phoenix Zoo.

Out of Africa, the wildlife park in Camp Verde, is another place to see newborn animals.

Our own Green Valley Park usually has ducklings about this time.

But, this is the time of year snowbird sightings become extremely rare.

The featherless ones have flown away to escape the upcoming temperatures -- just around the corner -- that make vehicles ovens and passengers toast.

I never tried to fry an egg on the top of a car when I was a kid (my dad would have tanned my hide for ruining the paint job with egg), but I did try it on the blacktop. Alas, it did not fry. As I recall my dog Socrates came along and ate my science experiment.

These days I hide plastic eggs.

They generate no dishes to be washed, they can't be used as a hair treatment, and my dog Malcolm turns up his nose at them.

Li'l rimeroos can race to find the Easter eggs at Rumsey Park, starting at 9:30 a.m. Saturday, April 15. Parks and Recreation puts on the event.

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