My mailbox is being flooded with mail concerning gas prices and illegal immigrants -- to boycott oil companies or not, to provide amnesty to illegal immigrants or not. Since I have become jaded to the various solutions proposed by the Republicans, Democrats, Sierra Club and ACLU, I have elected to solve the problems as they affect me. My solution solves both my gas and illegal immigrant problems.
Therefore, I have hired illegal immigrants to push my car. They're plentiful and cheaper than buying gas.
Donald Evans, Payson