Don’T Stand Up In The Roller Coaster

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Strapped into our little economic roller coaster, we’re not sure month-to-month whether to scream or cry.

Maybe a little of each.

So this month, we’re laughing, giddy, hollering.

Just a little. Just for a moment.

We’ll get a grip any minute now and consider the statistics soberly.

So Payson’s May financial report based on sales in April shows a stunning 52 percent rise in sales tax receipts, almost as hard to believe as last month’s 29 percent decline.

All right. That’s probably bogus — some mirage of the way in which the punch-drunk state is reporting the figures to the frightened towns. April (which is to say March sales) probably wasn’t as bad as the figures suggested and May (which is to say April sales) probably wasn’t as good as the most recent numbers imply.

Still, we can’t help but feel a little surge of hope, since other portents seem to support the trend of the sales tax figures.

The number of people who dropped by the Rim Country Regional Chamber of Commerce’s visitor center jumped 28 percent in May compared to a year ago, countywide hotel room occupancy rates rose 21 percent in April, visitation to Tonto Natural Bridge rose 24 percent in May.

All good news.

Granted, no real signs of life yet in construction — one of the pillars of Rim Country’s economy a couple of years ago. But hey: one must take comfort where one can.

Granted, it’d be dumb to throw a “We Survived the Great Recession” party just yet. But it probably wouldn’t hurt to scout out a cheap place for the bash — and maybe find a good local band.

In the meantime, don’t stand up while the roller coaster is still in motion. Just sit tight, hang on, keep the lap bar locked down. But don’t worry: It’s OK to scream — or cry for that matter.

As for us, we feel one of those crazy little laughs coming on.

Maybe it’s like a longtime marriage after a life trauma — getting laid off or burglarized or burned out. You hang onto each other until you get your nerve back — grateful for the people who got you through.

We’re so glad we’ve had all of you to get us through — even if there’s a couple more stomach-churning plunges from great heights still in store.

Father’s Day looms

The big day is nearly here: Father’s Day — busiest day of the year for collect phone calls. And while you’re pondering the implications of that statistic, we thought we’d offer up some of our favorite observations on fatherhood, in case you’re seeking something to scribble on that last-minute greeting card:

“If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a 50 percent chance of being right.” — Bill Cosby

“I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection.” — Sigmund Freud

“Fathers, like mothers, are not born. Men grow into fathers — and fathering is a very important stage in their development.” — David M. Gottesman

“The father of a daughter is nothing but a high-class hostage. A father turns a stony face to his sons, berates them, shakes his antlers, paws the ground, snorts, runs them off into the underbrush, but when his daughter puts her arm over his shoulder and says, ‘Daddy, I need to ask you something,’ he is a pat of butter in a hot frying pan.” — Garrison Keillor

“I said to my father one afternoon, ‘Daddy, will you take me to the zoo?’ He answered, ‘If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you.’” — Jerry Lewis

“Small boy’s definition of Father’s Day: It’s just like Mother’s Day, only you don’t spend so much.” — Unknown

“A father is a guy who has snapshots in his wallet where his money used to be.” — Unknown

“By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.” — Charles Wads

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